MY LOVE STORY 2. (1ST HEARTBREAK)

"WILL U MARRY ME?"

After I touched the SEND icon, she automatically froze and refused to reply;
After waiting for some minutes, I decided to go offline...

Surprisingly, i wasn't upset, WHY?, whenever she delayed while we're chatting, i usually get UPSET, at times, i go offline without saying BYE, but this time, I felt it was a huge question and i know she needs some time to think about it...
I didn't bother calling her cell or sending her texts like i normally do, I just felt like letting her be for some time, more like giving her enough time to think about the proposal...
Though I really wanted to hear her voice and know if she's OK but still, I withheld the urge, maybe when she's ready, she'll beep or text me. To be sincere, i didn't wanna text or call her so as to let her know i'm very serious about my proposal.

PAUSE...
The IDEA of giving her some time to think about it wasn't mine... In TRUE LOVE, there's no pride, each gender in the relationship must learn how to admit and say. ''I'M SORRY'' whenever there's a misunderstanding between them, no matter who committed the offense.
( Note: If the guy always take the credit even when he's innocent and the girl doesn't admit to her faults, then it means she doesn't love him. Likewise the Guy also )
The IDEA was created or generated by a friend of mine, he told me to let her be in order to show her i'm damn serious about my proposal, he said letting a few days pass by without calling or texting her would convince her that i can simply choose/date another girl if she fucks up.
( Yeah, It sounds COOL to me, you know, being able to change girls whenever you wish, dating as many as you want, dump any girl who isn't serious, and so on, it simply means the word HEART BREAK wouldn't exist in my world since there're many girls to choose from. Well, that's because you can only double or triple date if you aren't in love with any of them. [ FINE, i know the fact that i can switch girls whenever i wish was an Absolute Lie but hey!, at times, we gotta live a lie to boost our self esteem and sometimes, to get over one emotional infrastructure or the other. ] ... But c'mon, you can't blame me, you know, i'm just an Amateur in the whole love thing so i had to believe whatever anyone tells me when it comes to the issues of love. )

First Day.

Time: 11:48pm

I'm still up instead of being in bed having fun with my peers in dreamland. I can't say it was easy though no one said it would be easy except my friend. I spent all day thinking about her, you don't expect me to continue living my normal life as if nothing happened when i'm not sure if the one i love is alright, or safe... It was so difficult but still i had to endure.

Second Day.

Time: 7:05pm

Now i'm free, my books are all backed up in my brain cerebulum but my battery is low... So i sat on the bed with my head buried in my hands... After some minutes, i fell asleep.

After 3 Days...
Now the urge and desperation to hear her voice is kinda uncontrollable, i was too eager to know how she was doing, infact, i was now suffering from severe headache due to the fact that i've been thinking about her for the past few days. I was worried...
What if she's sick,
What is she lost her phone,
What if her phone was stolen,
What if her parents restricted her from coming online or using any phone,
What if she's dead (GOD FORBID),
What if they relocated to another state, What if she's fed up with me,

PAUSE:
MARY isn't the type of girl that leaves a friend in the dark, no matter what happens, she always had a way of communicating with her friends, Same with me also... Can U imagine she once called me with her dad's phone while he was taking his bath just to tell me she loves me. Well, that's the type of girl she is... So considerate, caring, nice, sweet, cute, e.t.c

Back To The Story :
The positive and negative thoughts being generated by my brain were just too much that i rushed to the couch, picked up my phone, switched it on and....

Openning 2go. .. ...

Connecting. .. ...

Logging in. .. ...

Preparing your 2go account. .. ...

Starting 2go. .. ...

Loading. .. ...

And finally, i'm online...

Guess what...

She's Online... Her status...

'' Being In A Relationship Is Like Being Held Prisoner ''

So i typed first...

''Hi''

''Hy, aw ya doin''

''Nt Bad n U''

''Kul''

Then I asked if she still loves me...

Her reply:

''I should be the one asking that question, you havn't been online for some days now and you couldn't even call or text me to know how I was doing, yet, you claim you love me, I don't have much to say and please save the apologies for yourself, I don't need em.''

''Sweetie, Fine, I know what I did was wrong, i'll gladly accept whatever punishment you deem fit for my offence but at least, can you give me a chance to explain.''

''Alright, go ahead and explain...''

After explaining everything that happened within the past few days, the situation got worse...

''Emmy, don't tell me your friends tell you what to do now or is our relationship based on your friend's instructions and opinions ?, gosh!!!, I can't believe you value your friends than I.

''Sweetie, Don't look at it that way, Please try to understand...''

She goes offline...

I called but she refused to pick, texted but no reply...
After some minutes, she sent a text asking me to come online...

''I'm sorry''

''It's Ok, but Emmy, I don't think I can do this anymore, i feel i'm too young to handle the trials in a relationship, we're still too young for this...''

''Sweetie, I promise it wouldn't happen again''

''I know it won't and i'm not saying this because of what you did or what happened, it's entirely based on a different issue, I just can't do this anymore... I'M SORRY''

PAUSE :
The pain I was going through then can't be compared with that of someone who just lost his new build Plaza to a Fire Disaster. I was broken, devastated, weak, upset, annoyed, sad, depressed, empty, helpless, emotionally drained, e.t.c... all at the same time, what I was going through while reading her texts at that moment can't be expressed in words, it's like the combination of all the negative expressions that exist in life, I could feel my heart being shattered, being banged with a hammer, it's just like the world was paused cause all I could hear then was my heartbeat, I was totally confused, I didn't know what to type or even how to reply, I just wished it could all stop cause if it were a dream, i'm not sure I would ever wake up. Only those who has ever had their heart broken by someone whom they trully love would understand my words.

''Sweetie... Please STOP''

''I'M SORRY... Let's just get back to what we were before, A Bro. and Sis...''

After getting a hold of myself...

''Alright, we can break up, let's just say we're taking a vaccation for each of us to go out into the world and know what dating is really all about and when we're off-age, we can get back together...''
But she made everything clear saying we can't date each other again, that we were breaking up for real...
The pain was just too much that I went offline...

Some weeks later...
I was already used to the whole heart break thing and we were now friends, but we don't chat like we used to, maybe an hour or two, while sometimes, we don't chat at all even when we're both online. At times, we quarrel for some weeks but later settle the dispute.

The first fight we had was because she shared me a friend of hers and asked me to date her... Just maybe she thinks dating is all about oppurtunity.
Well, dating to me isn't all about oppurtunities or luck, I feel it's all about DESTINY.
I believe Love is practically connected to our Destiny cause we don't choose who we love, it isn't optional or delibrate, ( If it'z true love ).
Falling in love at a certain time with a particular person is something we're expected to go through at a particular time during our journey in life, just like difficulties and maybe heart-break... We'll talk about that later when i'm through with my ''Personnal Love Theorem''.

Since i'm not in love with her friend considering the fact she's a total stranger to me, I politely turned her down, though now, I wish I hadn't, if I knew dating her even when I don't love her would make her happy, I wouldn't mind taking her as a spouse. Cause right now, I feel awfully guilty for her current predicament.

She dated her a guy in her vicinity who attends the same church with her. When I learnt about it, I pleaded with her to share him with me, I offered to test his love for her and unfortunately, he denied being in a relationship with her. I asked her to give him a second chance cause he was willing to change and since she loves him, and she did.
Now, she's heart-broken... The guy ignores her calls, avoids her presence, and neglects her text messages.

I'm here thinking she wouldn't have gone through all that if I never turned her down when Cynthy introduced her to me... Then again... I can't displease myself to please someone else...
Normally, i'll say LOVE IS COMPLICATED, LIFE itself is Complicated as well. We just keep living trying to endure and overcome obstacles in life, thats why our ability to pass through all these defines our capability.